Wednesday, 19 May 2010

Up, down

I wish this unknowing feeling wouldn't stick around... I can't help but freak out about my future, what is it going to be, is it even going to be? I feel like I've fallen down a well and I'm fighting and clawing trying to climb back up but I just keep falling down, and I'm running out of energy, I don't wanna fight anymore, I just wanna let go, and be in peace. It scares me to death when I dig deep into my mind looking for answers, cause all I find is darkness, how did I let this happen to me? How did I suddenly lose faith in myself, or maybe I never had any in the first place?

My sleeping pattern has been so messed up, firstly I couldn't sleep at all, then suddenly I was falling asleep at 10:30, yet waking up during the night. Last night was very disturbed and all I could do was toss and turn. But all I really wanna do is fall into a deep sleep, it seems to make it go away. Someone save me from myself.

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